The Rat King

I'm actually getting excited for Christmas. I'm going over to a friend's house (my friend Canada), and another friend, who is also gluten-intolerant, is coming over as well. We're going to have a turkey dinner (dairy and gluten-free), and make gluten-free cookies. We're also going to play games and maybe watch movies, and visit Canada's twins in the hospital. (They were born early, and are still at the hospital.)

It can be hard to be the orphan at someone else's family celebration, and I think Canada is as relieved as I am to just be hanging out with friends. Although I do have to say that my last Thanksgiving with friends and their family was a lot of fun. The food was wonderful, and bingo was a riot. Literally, it almost was a riot! Very passionate bingo. I am touched that for both Thanksgiving and Christmas, people are going out of their way to make dairy and gluten-free food that I can eat. It actually makes me feel a little emotional.

I am going to attempt a Kristina-friendly pumpkin pie again this year. I absolutely love pumpkin pie. I got a pre-made wheat-free crust, and I have a recipe for the filing that uses soy instead of regular milk. Last year, it took a really long time to cook. I don't know if it was my oven or the soy milk just didn't set up like cow's milk. Maybe I should try my friend's oven and see if that works better.

There's a Christmas tree in the lobby at work, and it smells intoxicating. I love that evergreen tree smell. I have to pause for a bit when I go through the lobby to take it all in. We're inclusive, so there's also a menorah and Islamic decorations too. Just to make this week an orgy of holiday cheer, I'm watching the San Francisco Ballet's performance of The Nutcracker on PBS. It is quite lovely. I was in ballet when I was a kid (age 4 to 14). I quit when they wanted to put me on point shoes because I didn't want to ruin my feet. Our ballet teacher had been a professional dancer, and had to walk with a cane because of what it did to her. I totally have the wrong body for ballet anyway- too short and curvy. The teacher was always smacking me in the butt with her cane because it stuck out too much. I did okay because I worked really hard and have high arches. (That's my MO, people- a little bit of natural talent and working my ass off. Not literally, of course.) The other girls taped their boobs down and starved themselves, though, and I just wasn't into that lifestyle.

I still love to watch ballet though, and sometimes I'm a big dork and dance around my apartment, doing plies and leaping and pointing my toes. I blame ballet for my fascination with the show "So You Think You Can Dance" and occasional urges to listen to classical music. On the positive side, my flexibility is a plus in hockey. I can go down in all sorts of awkward positions and not hurt myself.

So I'm thinking Christmas won't be all that bad. I don't even feel slightly hatefully about it this year. I'm a little sad and anxious, but not as much as I thought I would be. We'll see how I feel later in the week.