I was grade-obsessed little student not just to try to impress my parents,
but also to convince the whole world, including myself, that I was
worthwhile. I was pretty good at it too, when I could keep my focus. It was
an escape for me- I could lose myself in homework the same way I did in
books. I also felt competent and smart when I was at school. Same with my
job now. I feel like I'm going to be okay as long as I'm doing well at my
job. It gives me a sense of stability.